Self-trust
- Abuser Loyalty, Acceptance, Anger, Church doctrine, Church Exodus, Codependency, Cultural Behavior, Danna Hartline's articles, Depression, Discrimination, Dissociation, Dissonance, Effects of Trauma on the Family, Fear, Fellowship, LDS Women, Leadership, Mental Illness, Modesty, Mormon Culture, Organizational Behavior, Patriarchal Structure, Post Traumatic Church Syndrome, Self-Care, Self-trust, Sex, Shame, Suicide, Trauma vs. Offense, Unrighteous Dominion, Unsafe policies
Chapter 5: Four More Consequences of Church Trauma
Chapter 4 discussed four common effects of Church Trauma: cognitive dissonance, church exodus, dissociation, and abuser loyalty. This chapter addresses four more consequences of Church Trauma: loss of identity, mental disorder, family dysfunction, and shame. Loss of Identity Trauma messes with concept of self. After one is traumatized by the Church, victims often have no idea who they are anymore. The Mormon Church is not just a religion; it’s a lifestyle. Hence traumatization can cause a complete upheaval to a person’s construction of reality, including the self, other people, life, and the future. Few can appreciate the sheer terror religious trauma can create (Tarico, 2015). Many considerations must be examined—“Should…
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My 2020 Birthday Mantra
For my birthday, it’s become a tradition to write three statements of “I am…” as a way of noting growth and progress over the year. I’ve been doing this instead of New Year’s resolutions. The first year I did this (two years ago), my mantra was “I am worthy; I am good enough; I am unshamed” and by so doing, I noted more growth within a year’s time than ever before in my life. I was able to step out of a harmful environment which challenged me to seriously look at myself and by so doing, I really started to claim ownership of my life. I was astounded by the…
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My 2019 Mantra
Last year instead of writing New Year resolutions (which I have never been a fan of), I made three statements of “I am” on my birthday: I am worthy; I am enough; I am unashamed. They became my mantra for the year. I didn’t fully comprehend what I was doing last year by identifying these three truths. Yet consequently, as I internalized them, I experienced more growth and change within a year’s time than I have probably ever had. The impact they have had on me has been overwhelmingly powerful. Imagine my surpirse when I came across the words above by Joel Osteen because they have indeed been my experience this past…
- Anger, Ashley Kaye's articles, Courage to Speak Up, Effects of Trauma on the Family, Empathy, Examples of Courage, Healing, Self-Care, Self-trust, Trauma vs. Offense
WHY AM I SO TRIGGERED LATELY?
For the past few weeks, I have been reflecting on the importance of recognizing triggers within ourselves and others. As many have been following the ProtectLDSChildren.org movement, there have been many productive, eye-opening discussions as well as many destructive, angry triggering discussions. As a spiritual life coach-guide and healer, I am always trying to leave an open heart space as well as responding diplomatically to people (including self love, with my own journey). I admit, I have been emotionally triggered with some of the comments and discussions lately. On a couple occasions, I would openly discuss my frustrations with my husband. He said to me, “Why are you so angry?”…
- Abuser Loyalty, Acceptance, Anger, Codependency, Courage to Speak Up, Danna Hartline's articles, Effects of Trauma on the Family, Examples of Courage, Fellowship, Healing, lds culture, Leadership, Love, Mormon Culture, Self-trust, Sex, Shame, Unrighteous Dominion, welcoming
Is the LDS Church Increasing Its Appeal for Sexual Predators?
I have to say it: I really wonder about the direction the Mormon Church is moving. It just feels the Church is regressing. Two red flags have been raised recently: One is the disheartening excommunication of Sam Young in his effort to change policy about one-on-one interviews and the sexually explicit questioning of our youth. That alone is enough but I see another connection to Sam Young’s movement to protect LDS Children, which brings me to concern number two: the Church’s withdrawal in the Scouting program (which had interesting timing—two weeks after the BSA announced they would no longer discriminate against women, the Church backed out.). These two recent actions alarm me and…
- Codependency, Courage to Speak Up, Danna Hartline's articles, Dissonance, Effects of Trauma on the Family, Healing, lds culture, Leadership, Mental Illness, Mormon Culture, Self-Care, Self-trust, Shame, Suicide, Trauma vs. Offense, Trust the Lord
Church Trauma Is More Common than You Might Realize
Last month the Mormon Trauma Mama team hosted an invitation-only summit called When Church Hurts to talk about the problems we are seeing with church trauma and how we can promote awareness, healing, and change. We are still working on solutions to this problem—and will be for many years to come! But at the summit, I introduced a man who had a similar dilemma. Maybe you have heard about him. His name is Ignaz Semmelweis. Semmelweis was a fascinating man. He was a European doctor, an obstetrician, in the mid-1800s. He worked at Vienna’s General Hospital, an important research hospital, where he tried to get to the bottom of a…
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The Power of Personal Leadership
Codependency You might be surprised to know how common codependency is in businesses and organizations. Employees forget their passions, talents, and personal meaning to please bosses, earn higher salaries, and survive the economic landscape. It’s understandable that we need to make a living but our growth needs never die; they create feelings of boredom, stress, and listlessness if ignored for long periods of time. We learn compliance and conformity. Some exercise initiative to find the sweet spot of shared values. We become codependent when we take on shame or the assumption that we are somehow defective, and that something is wrong with us. We lose our innocence, take defectiveness as…
